Moxy Früvous, “The Drinking Song” (Bargainville, 1993)

Früvous’s lyrics were always amazing, but this song, the one they ended most of their shows with, was a standout. One line refers to records as plates of black food which just might be my favorite of all metaphors.

It’s also the only bona fide drinking song I know of that can genuinely be called sobering.

Between pulls, he said
“We’re like cows in the grass.
Brushing off flies
Chaise lounging around
Standing up falling down
Till we no longer opened our eyes.”

And we’d drink
Ever notice how drinking’s like war?
Cup o’ troops o’er the gums
To the end of our health
A campaign ’gainst myself
Armed with bourbons and scotches and rums

And the band played on
As the helicopters whirred
Drunk on the lawn in a nuclear dawn
My senses finally blurred.

Happy St. Pat’s. Be careful out there.