HELLO.

So I’m here now. That happened.

It’s all @lonelysandwich’s fault. He wrote this incredibly kind thing about me a few weeks ago, and I immediately resolved to get one of these Tumblrs as soon as they went on sale so I could give him a vigorous thanking. So before I start being funny—okay, mildly amusing—in long-form, I need to say a few things.

Adam Lisagor is the nicest guy in all eleven internets, and that includes the ones that look all jumbly unless you wear the special glasses. He was the 24th person to follow me on the Twitter, and I really didn’t deserve it then. But I think he has a secret hobby of finding unknown Twitterers and lavishing them with praise until they stop talking about David Hasselhoff. I don’t know. Whatever his motives, I would never have found this community—this shockingly intelligent, diverse, vibrant, shut-the-fuck-up-Maureen-Dowd real goddamn community—if it hadn’t been for him.

He’s also one of the funniest. I’ve watched the promo video for Birdhouse at least fifteen times, and I still can’t watch it in my big-boy pants. And do I even have to link to his podcast? I don’t care, I’m doing it anyway, because if there’s a single person in the world who likes my stuff but somehow isn’t listening to You Look Nice Today, that’s an injustice I can’t live with.

And then there’s Tiborg.

But you know what I like most about Adam? There’s almost no sarcasm in his toots.  If there are any disparaging remarks, they’re nearly always self-directed. I can’t say the same about mine, because I lack whatever rare quality allows him to be consistently funny without resorting to nastiness. I salute you, Mr. Sandwich. And I envy you.

So there you have it. Future posts will be less saccharine and, most likely, since I can’t help who I am, full of juvenile “humor” and terrible puns. Or possibly just naughty pictures and poems about cats. I’ll let you know as soon as I figure out this Tumblr thing.